Being a sports dad is fun, but it’s important to know how to encourage and develop our kids not just in sports, but life. Over 17 very short years ago, my wife announced that she was pregnant with our first. Awesome. As if that weren’t exciting (translate: STRESSFUL) enough, she couldn’t wait to find out if we were having a boy or a girl. HA! I already knew:)
Stats don’t lie
My grandfather has always joked about having 5 daughters…
He says, “Jeremie, even our dog was a girl.”
So I knew that I was destined to have a daughter first:)
The day I went along to our big ‘reveal’ appointment here’s what happened…
Surprise – It’s a girl!
My wife was so excited:) I was too, but all I remember was being suddenly hot that I needed to leave the room.
Looking back, I would never want to change a thing. Having girls is amazing and I thank God for them.
My first daughters soccer experience
Most new dads can’t wait to be a ‘sports dad’…
As was I, but purposely I did NOT bring a soccer ball around for the next several years…
Kids are going to naturally have a desire to choose what interests them, so being patient was important for me. Sure, putting a ball in their face early will probably get them to play, but I believe people have a passion born in them.
Therefore, we let them try several different sports so they could see how they liked each one.
Once they are about 9-10 years old most kids know what their favorite sport is. That’s when you start to give them more opportunity to help build their skill set.
As teenagers, my oldest danced/ballet and my youngest played soccer.
What to do when they’re not naturals
Fast forward to when mine was 5 years old…
My oldest daughter used to swear that she was a soccer player; not wanted to be one but IS already one by nature of being my daughter.
Having watched her develop as a young girl I knew coordination wasn’t a problem, but aggression was.
So we found a coach who was about the development of confidence…
I went to the first game with half-excitement and half-dread… It was obvious that she wasn’t one of the natural players…
Not only was she not aggressive AT ALL – she kept looking over at us waving:)
She skipped around the field or chased the pile of players.
By the time she turned 10 she decided that her favorite sports activity was ballet… To this day she still loves ballet & I am happy for her.
I don’t care if my kids play soccer, as long as they find something they can enjoy and learn life lessons in.
The key for parents is being patient and just enjoying the moment.
My second daughters soccer experience
Long story short, my second kiddo started off very similar in terms of lack of aggression…
I was like “O here we go again.”
But this time I became her coach after her first 2 seasons because the league was short coaches.
From age 7-11 I coached them in rec, before moving them to club/select at age 11/12. Currently they play U14 Girls Classic League in Dallas and are in 2nd place out of 10 teams. This is about a 4th tier league out of 15 leagues, sometimes competing against ECNL-RL-NTX teams.
The last few years they were rec, the top half were club level in terms of technique… In the off-season we played indoor against club teams, finishing 2nd place out of 9 teams.
Point is that most “club soccer” is watered down… Out of 10 different leagues/levels, 60% is just expensive rec. The top 10% has very good and aggressive athletes.
Yearly cost: Club = $3,000 – $10,000 vs Rec = $300-$400.
Training outweighs a club brand.
The key is good training, a good group of parents and kids, patient attitude and confidence building.
Easier said than done, but if you have any questions what we do email me or read this blog article on what drills to do.
For now, I’ll continue to be her coach and support her as a sports dad.
Great video ⇓
What’s really important is attitude
After her [my oldest] first full year of playing, I learned to not only appreciate her awesome attitude.
I really began to see the impact she was making on and off the field as a person.
It honestly chokes me up as I think about her response to life and people’s response to her.
Talk about a reality check about what’s important; I know there is no better gift than that…
Toward the end of the Spring season she did begin to improve.
She would actually kick the ball and displayed a speed that would make ANY parent (athlete or non-athlete) proud.
Although it wasn’t planned, it did make her differences stick out even more.
The most important things a sports dad can teach
I don’t know what the future holds for my daughters, but they will impact many people to know truth in life and lead by example.
The drive to do well and have a spirit of excellence in all things is growing and maturity.
I do want to close with this word of advice though…
This soccer season as you’re busy helping your children identify their goals and pursue them.
Remember that the most important concepts we’re teaching them is development of their character, drive and attitude.
The cool thing is that maybe you’ll get lucky like I did and in your efforts to teach, instruct and guide, you’re kids will teach you something too, just like mine did.
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